


where longing lingers

by jongdae (babykibum)



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Gen, kinda vague too, somewhat dark themed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-13
Updated: 2016-06-13
Packaged: 2018-07-14 18:52:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7185911
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/babykibum/pseuds/jongdae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>PeterPan!AU with a twist: Chanyeol is the boy who lives forever. Kyungsoo doesn't seek forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	where longing lingers

**Author's Note:**

> this is a word vomit in earnest. if this was a drawing, it would be a sketch that is drawn halfheartedly. it is messy. i realize that at the end of it, i am not quite fond of what has been written. u_u don't expect much, expect mistakes instead. i didn't really proofread it because i want to run away from this.

Earth, when Chanyeol visits the place at night, is beautiful sometimes.

It’s not as ethereal as compared to Neverland though. Neverland is timeless and eternal. But Earth, even when the time passes relentlessly here, the stars are still scattered across its black canvas and the moon shines in a peculiar way that takes Chanyeol’s breath away every time he looks at it. In Neverland, the moon is lovely, but it’s different. It doesn’t shine as prettily, it doesn’t cause tightness in his chest like the Earth moon does. He doesn’t know why. Maybe because looking at the moon here, he feels like he is longing for something.

This time when Chanyeol comes down to Earth, he doesn’t tell the lost boys about his adventure. They won’t miss him anyway. They play well by their own. Tinkerbell begs to come but Chanyeol sends her away, threatening to leave her with the mermaids if she keeps on being stubborn. It’s cruel, really. Chanyeol has thought about it sometimes, the way the fairy always follows him around. She’s a fun company to have with but when Chanyeol goes to Earth, he always likes to be alone. He wants to go alone.

The place that goes Chanyeol tonight is… odd. It’s shady at best; a market that makes trades of what Chanyeol is sure as illegal or something equally immoral. He’s been coming down here for several times already, always hiding himself cleverly in the darkest of shadows. At night, it’s much easier to slip past the people without being noticed. The people in the town call this place the black market. Chanyeol finds them fascinating, the things that are being traded here. But the sight this whole place holds isn’t something pretty to watch. The rare swords and gems are quite alright. Maybe Hook would even appreciate it if he gets him something from here. But there are some… that Chanyeol can’t quite comprehend.

He’s not sure why he keeps coming back here too. There’s just something that keeps pulling him here. Maybe it’s the nature of the market, unkind and a set contrast to the moon. Maybe it’s the moon itself here. When Chanyeol looks up to it, in the midst of all these ugly truths happening, the moon is still as lovely. It reminds him to not be… sad. He thinks it must be it. Don’t be sad. The Earth moon tells him to not be sad, and Chanyeol longing lingers somewhere.

He walks quietly through the stalls in the market, trying to be inconspicuous as he could. Darting from shadow to shadow, listening in to exchanges being made at every corner of the market.

“Sixty five gold coins for just a small jar of unicorn blood? You’re barking mad,” a man with a large belly hidden beneath thick coat hisses towards the young woman inside the stall. She doesn’t look bothered by his remark. Her smile deepens instead, sly, cunning, as she leans forward.

“Oh, but this is not just any unicorn blood. The damn animal was killed during full moon. You know the blood heals more when it’s drawn out while the round moon is out.”

Chanyeol listens quietly to the negotiation, hiding himself behind the stall. In Neverland, there are no unicorns. He’s not even sure what unicorns look like, except that the animal may have horn in its head, and its blood apparently has healing abilities.

While the man with the pot belly grunts his respond but makes his payment begrudgingly for the small jar, Chanyeol slips away, light on his feet. He walks, mostly, but to any keen eyes they would notice that his feet don’t actually touch the ground. But in this moonlight, and in the place like here, no one cares to look carefully, minding their own business.

Chanyeol’s turning towards an alley when he hears it.

“What are you going on about asking for the fountain of youth, young man?” The stall owner is old. With beaded eyes and white beard growing thick, his rough voice fits the image of a crook, Chanyeol thinks. Like Hook too, maybe.

The man waiting in front of his stall is small. He wears hooded cloak and its hood is pulled down, hiding his eyes. It’s quickly drawing other people’s attentions towards them, because the old man’s voice was loud earlier, almost accusing, and the man with his cloaked figure makes it seems like he is up to no good. Though Chanyeol would think no one is up to doing something good in here, but still. Chanyeol waits by the corner before the alley. The stall is right next to it, so it’s easy to eavesdrop like this.

“Never mind,” the cloaked man mutters before quickly leaving the stall. Chanyeol’s eyes trail after him. It seems like he’s going towards the exit of the market.

Chanyeol follows him.

The street is actually rather peaceful outside the market. It’s deserted, sure, and eerily quiet he finds it to be. And Chanyeol is tailing the man behind not so subtlety. There’s nothing for him to be on tip toes for.

“What do you want?” The man finally says after they’re a good distance away from the market. Their surrounding is still quiet, only patches of land that stretches long on both sides of the cobbled street they are on. It would lead them to the town, Chanyeol knows this. The market has been located outside of it, a territory silently marked by the… not so good side, Chanyeol guess.

“Nothing, really,” Chanyeol says back. This time he flies towards the man, though he lands on his feet before the man could see it, and walks beside him. “I only wanted to know why you are searching for the fountain of youth.”

The man stops abruptly. He doesn’t turn towards Chanyeol, nor does he pulls away his hood. He’s way shorter than Chanyeol is. The top of the man’s head is right below Chanyeol’s chin that, with just the moonlight, Chanyeol can only see the fullness of his lips and the tip of his nose. Chanyeol waits.

“That is none of your business,” the man finally answers. He’s about to start walking again when Chanyeol steps in front of him and directly blocks his path.

“My name is Chanyeol and I’m the boy from Neverland,” he introduces himself. “If you are perhaps searching for something that deals funny with time, I could take you there.” He looks at the man carefully, trying to gauge his reaction. It’s difficult, since Chanyeol can’t read his hidden eyes.

But the man only chuckles, lips forming a smirk. Chanyeol is tempted to pull the hood away from his face.

“You are simply mad, aren’t you?” The man’s voice is deep and when he laughs, it rumbles in his chest.

“Have you never heard of me? The boy that doesn’t age? The one that stays young forever? I thought people love me in their bedtime stories.” Chanyeol has listened in to many bedtime stories; in the shadows inside the children’s rooms, by the window. Under the beds, sometimes, when he couldn’t find the place to hide himself and still manage to listen to mothers lulling their children to sleep with stories. There hasn’t been a favorite version of his though.

“Those are only fictions. Fairy tales. Stupid, sweet things they tell the kids so they can sleep without nightmares at night.” The man tries to side step Chanyeol. But Chanyeol stops him, one step to the left, one step to the right.

The man sighs and finally, _finally_ he pulls his hood back and looks up at Chanyeol. His eyes… are round, wide. Like the moon. Chanyeol doesn’t know what he expected from the man, but it is not this. Whatever this is.

Not the way his eyes seem to look right into Chanyeol’s soul, deep, unsettling. The Earth moon makes Chanyeol longs for something, like something is amiss inside him. This man, with his round eyes reflecting the moon, Chanyeol suddenly finds himself yearning for him. Somehow. Peculiar. It’s very peculiar the way Earth makes him feel so different than he does in Neverland. Maybe it is because of the time here, where people grow old tirelessly. Maybe it is just the moon, pretty with its light, beaming in the night sky and upon Earth.

“Listen, kid,” the man says, almost tiredly. Like Chanyeol is stealing his time unnecessarily. But Chanyeol finds that he does want to steal this man’s time, and he wants to give him even more time than the man can do with it. “I have no time for you and your stupid gibberish. Step aside and run along back to where you come from.”

“No.” Chanyeol stops him again. This time his hands are easily holding the man by his arms. The man looks back up to him. His eyes are hard on Chanyeol. There is a frown in between his brows. “Come with me. To Neverland. I wouldn’t be able to give you the fountain of youth, but I could give you eternal life. If you stay there, you’ll have forever.”

“Cut it with your lies, kid. I have enough nonsense for the day already.”

When the man struggles to be released from his hold, Chanyeol tightens his grip and pulls the man closer to him, almost hugging him. Then his feet leaves the ground and he sees, the way the man’s eyes widen even more, looking at Chanyeol in disbelief. That they are hovering, just above the ground but there nonetheless. The ground is not the Earth they are standing on.

“Do you believe me now? That I’m the boy from Neverland? Surely you have heard that he could fly too?”

“You are a fucking nutcase,” the man hisses. He struggles again, trying to free himself from Chanyeol. But Chanyeol, he doesn’t want to let the man go. He keeps him there, in his hold, and Chanyeol brings them up even higher. His grip on the man is strong, stronger than before. He doesn’t want him to fall.

“Get me down!”

“But do you believe me?”

“You are trying to kill me, that’s what.”

“You know if you say you don’t believe in fairies, in Neverland, the fairies die.” Chanyeol tells the man, looking at him, trying to find a flicker of something. Understanding, perhaps. Or acceptance. That Chanyeol is not just someone who is selling lies in the black market. That Chanyeol could be someone he trusted.

“That’s fucking brilliant,” the man says sarcastically while trying to kick Chanyeol, but it’s futile really. It’s so easy to keep them up here, a good distance from the ground. The man is small, and Chanyeol has been flying since forever, picking up pieces here and there while travelling, keeping them close in his hold.

“Tell me your name.” Chanyeol asks. “I’ll bring you down when you tell me.”

“Fine,” the man grits his teeth. “Kyungsoo. Now bring me down, you fool kid.”

Kyungsoo. _Kyungsoo Kyungsoo Kyungsoo._

Chanyeol flies back down, lowering them slowly. As soon as their feet touch the ground, as soon as Chanyeol lets go of the man— _Kyungsoo_ , Chanyeol reminds himself— has Chanyeol pinned to the ground, the left side of his face pressed against dirt. The tiny, jagged rocks feel like they are cutting through his skin. Chanyeol feels like laughing somehow.

“Do you know that,” Kyungsoo leans down, whisper in Chanyeol’s ear in a voice almost like growling, “I could send you away to the black market, sell you, or cut you up even in pieces. Anyone would have wanted you, the boy who can fly. I could earn many fine diamonds if I sell you to one of those filthy rich lords here.”

“But you wouldn’t.” He tries to talk properly, really, but with pebbles and dirt in his mouth, it’s difficult to say the words clearly.

Kyungsoo pins him harder. Chanyeol thinks he already has two small cuts on his left cheek. There are sounds of footsteps close to them. _Oh_. He could have been seen. He hears Kyungsoo swears under his breath, and Chanyeol can’t see from where he is on the ground, but then the footsteps pass, slowly sounding far again. Chanyeol tries to lift his face away from the rough surface. Kyungsoo’s hold has weakened since the footsteps were coming before.

“You wouldn’t bring me back to the market,” Chanyeol says, trying to look up at Kyungsoo. The man pushes his head back down.

“If you try something funny again, I will not hesitate to harm you.”

“Alright, nothing funny.” And when Kyungsoo has yet to let him go, Chanyeol adds, “could you let me go now? My face hurt.”

Chanyeol’s face meets the ground again in a really painful manner, a rock cutting his upper lip, before Kyungsoo finally lets him go. Chanyeol brings himself up quickly, feet not touching the ground, and looks at the man with the cloak. He could taste blood from the cut in his lip. Still, Kyungsoo… Kyungsoo has the eyes akin like the moon, Chanyeol thinks. Silly. Unsettling. He rubs his cheek, the one with the small cuts. They are not deep enough to draw blood though.

“Are you letting me go? Or do you want to come with me? To Neverland?”

“I don’t trust you just yet, kid.” Kyungsoo eyes him warily. He looks around and pulls his hood back down but this time, it doesn’t cover his eyes. “Get back to the ground before someone else sees you.”

Chanyeol obliges, standing in front of him. “I’m not a kid, and my name is Chanyeol.”

Kyungsoo scoffs. “Right, not a kid. The one that stays young forever.” He turns around, starts walking again. Chanyeol falls into step next to him easily.

“I’ve been living for a very long time already. I’m not exactly young anymore, though I look like it.”

“And yet the stories tell us that all you do is play.”

“I thought you don’t believe in the bedtimes stories.”

Chanyeol can see the lights from the town now. They are already nearing the edge of it.

Kyungsoo sighs.

“The fountain of youth,” Kyungsoo speaks softly, “they say it exists somewhere. Somewhere far, maybe not anywhere near here at all. In the books, the fountain is said to grant you more years when you drink it.”

“So you want forever? Neverland, where I come from, it has forever.”

“I don’t want forever,” Kyungsoo snaps.

“Are you starting to believe me?”

Chanyeol wants to look at Kyungsoo, looks into his eyes. The ones that make him longs for Kyungsoo somehow, the way the moon makes him feels. If Kyungsoo believes him… Chanyeol would be. He would be whole. He thinks he would. Living in Neverland, with forever in your hands, it makes you grow weary sometimes. Chanyeol doesn’t tell Tinkerbell about this, that sometimes he wants to go away. He doesn’t tell the lost boys, when they want him to play with them but all Chanyeol wants to do is sit on the edge of Neverland, looking at nothing. The moon on Earth, it makes him yearn for something even more.

“I don’t,” Kyungsoo simply answers.

“Why?”

“I don’t know. It’s not something to believe in.”

“But you saw me fly. I let you fly with me.”

“You forced me,” Kyungsoo mutters.

Chanyeol shrugs. “But still.”

The town, at night, is brightly lit with its street lights and those coming from the insides of houses. Chanyeol’s not sure of the time, but it’s probably past midnight already for them.

“Are you going home?” Chanyeol asks.

Kyungsoo stops. Chanyeol looks at him, waiting. Waiting yet again for the night. The cut on his upper lip still stings a little. He touches it tentatively with his finger, wiping away blood already drying on his broken skin.

“I don’t have a home here,” says Kyungsoo. “I’ll just be going through the town and then away from this place.”

“You’re not from here?”

“No. Not here.”

“Can I come with you?”

“Why would you want to? Go home, where ever it is your home is.” Kyungsoo gestures with his hand, trying to send Chanyeol away. He starts walking again, and again Chanyeol falls into step next to him.

“There is nothing back at Neverland for me anymore.” Not the eternal life.

Kyungsoo looks at him, but Chanyeol can’t read him somehow. Their walk is silent. The moon above them is hiding behind dark clouds. Chanyeol can see the stars still, glittering across the sky. Among them, he is sure Neverland is looking down upon him. He wonders what would happen. If he doesn’t come back to Neverland, would they search for him? Chanyeol thinks, when someone leaves Neverland long enough, they are forgotten. Their memories in people’s minds, they fade away. That’s how Neverland keeps its eternal life intact, keeps the time flow yet not dragging anyone with it.

“They will forget me,” Chanyeol tells Kyungsoo as they walk along narrow path, houses close to one another in each side. “Neverland, and everyone in it. They forget, when people leave.”

“Won’t that make you sad? To be forgotten?” Kyungsoo’s hood has slipped down a little as they walk on, almost covering his eyes. Chanyeol itches to see them uncovered.

“I think I’ve been sad for a long time already, being there,” Chanyeol admits. His feet don’t touch the ground. Habits, he thinks absentmindedly. Kyungsoo doesn’t seem to mind. He might not notice it, but Chanyeol thinks Kyungsoo knows better already.

Kyungsoo doesn’t say anything for a long while. The town is asleep. Chanyeol is not sure how long it will take them to walk through the whole town. He thinks about Kyungsoo, of the fountain of youth that he wants. Why want more years only, and not forever?

 “Why do you want it? If forever is not what you seek?”

Kyungsoo takes his time answering Chanyeol. Maybe he is trying to pick out his words carefully. Maybe he wants to conceal the truth. Chanyeol doesn’t know.

“I only want more time,” Kyungsoo tells him some time later, after they pass a huge structure, where the windows are pretty even in the lack of light. “It is not forever that I want. You, and your land, whatever, will not give me what I want.”

“Let me come with you then.” If Neverland has nothing for Kyungsoo, if Chanyeol has nothing to offer him from where he comes from, then Chanyeol wants to go. Wherever Kyungsoo goes, the man with eyes like the moon, where Chanyeol’s longing lingers. “Kyungsoo, let me come with you.”

“Do you know, when you leave this town, you enter a different one? It is a town that exists in a different dimension than the other. They say you can’t look at the sun when you are there.”

In Neverland, when you go deep into the woods, there are magical beings living there, hiding in plain sight. Chanyeol knows they use illusions, clever beings that don’t want to mingle with others. Earth, it seems, has its own tricks with the lights too. He doesn’t doubt Earth has magical beings too. There were the unicorns, he thinks. Earth, when it comes down to it, isn’t that much different from Neverland. Only that Earth is absence with eternal life in every nook and cranny, and Neverland exists because of it. He wants to see Earth, explore its corners.

“I won’t miss seeing the sun. I love the moon here,” Chanyeol says. He casts another look at Kyungsoo. His hood is pulled back slightly now, and Chanyeol can see his eyes.

“Fine.” Kyungsoo slows down. They have been walking for some time, Chanyeol doesn’t really know. But dawn is nearing on them, he knows this, and soon enough that dawn will be breaking. The houses in the town are still silent, but the birds would chirp soon.

“The first light is out soon,” Kyungsoo says, side stepping a hole in the road, “and the new town will take the whole of our morning to reach there. The sun will be right up above our head at around two in the afternoon. That’s when we need to enter.”

Chanyeol considers this. “I can take us there, flying. It’ll be easier, and faster.”

Kyungsoo shoots him a glare. His eyes are hard, unlike the moon. Still, they reach out to Chanyeol. Chanyeol ducks his head, sheepish.

“We’ll walk.”

Chanyeol wonders if Kyungsoo is not tired. The town is still sleeping. Perhaps, there is so much more to Kyungsoo than just a man seeking for the fountain of youth. Maybe his eyes are not simply reflecting the moon. Maybe they lure Chanyeol in for something.

“You’re having me? You’re letting me come with you?”

“You won’t leave if I ask you to, would you?”

“No. I’d stay.” Chanyeol will stay. Wherever it is Kyungsoo wants to go, Chanyeol will follow him. Like the way his eyes have followed the Earth moon, he would follow Kyungsoo.

“Then, you are coming with me.”

Okay. Okay, Chanyeol thinks. Perhaps he could find his time with Kyungsoo, away from Neverland. No longer eternal, but living on borrowed time now. Neverland will forget him. Kyungsoo wouldn’t, right? He wouldn’t forget Chanyeol when the time has come for them to part? Chanyeol will give him… everything, he realizes this. He has given up Neverland already for Kyungsoo. Leaving Neverland for a long time, he’d be forgotten.

Their steps echo each other. Dawn is breaking slowly. Chanyeol looks up at the moon, where is it already disappearing itself. But he has Kyungsoo now. In daylight, he will have Kyungsoo. There is no sun that would matter. He has longed for something, back in Neverland, and now he’s here. The man with the moon eyes, pulling the strings of Chanyeol’s heart towards him. Kyungsoo already has Chanyeol wrapped around his finger.

This is where Chanyeol belongs now. By Kyungsoo’s side.  By the man’s side, who seeks for the fountain of youth, for however long he would have Chanyeol. And Chanyeol doesn’t mind. He has had forever, and it wears him down. He would give his time for Kyungsoo. Kyungsoo wouldn’t… cast him away so soon, right? And maybe he would, but Chanyeol will not be sad. He is the boy who lives forever, and Kyungsoo doesn’t seek forever.

The first ray of sun breaks through the horizon. Chanyeol steals glances at Kyungsoo. The man has a smile on his lips now, a promise of many things in the future.

Chanyeol gives all his time to Kyungsoo.

 


End file.
